Post by The Abyss on Oct 27, 2004 8:31:36 GMT
By Scarecrazy...
A Warning to all Adventurers!
It has come to the attention of the Ancient Anguish Tourism Council that
there are extremely dangerous monsters in the woods out there. The Council
advises that adventurers, especially those with lesser experience, should
try to avoid these bad characters, especially the putrid grey troll, who
was responsible for 58 deaths in the last 3 months alone.
His friends Ogre, Big Ogre and Giant Ogre racked up 37, 34 and 18 kills
respectively, putting Ogres right in the lead in the race for the race
with the meanest tempers.
In Tantallon, the authorities want a local thug by the name of Villa
"The Unpredictable" for questioning in connection with 32 murders. Dermott,
the Fish Monger, claims that Villa is responsile for at least 15 more
deaths. It looks like there is a serial killer on the loose, folks!
Please stay away from those hill Giants, people. We have no fewer than
30 reports of fatalities after encounters with these hugely bad-tempered
beings. And while we're talking about letting sleeping dogs lie, don't
irritate Orcs! The Clerics Common Church reports that 61 adventurers
died after picking a fight with various unsanitary Orcs.
From Nepeth, the Sherriff reports that Orc raiders have been responsible
for the deaths of 36 adventurers, and outraged citizens are crying out
for justice. "Where are the Knights when we need them!?" a grief-stricken
poor man, who couldn't afford to have his family buried, told our reporter.
The Sherriff informs us that despite his efforts to dispatch 14 unsavoury
characters himself, the raiders just keep coming.
From Balan we have received reports that the Beast is still at large, and
15 brave adventurers have died after heroic, nay, titanic clashes with
the Beast. Ach, shame.
It is dangerous to cross Wizards, as well. Dawg heads the list with 155
recorded deaths in the last 3 months. In comparison, Flint, Cat and Aria
make poor showings with 61, 60 and 58 deaths respectively, while Asyvan,
Greyson and Sudian are neck-to-neck with 36, 34 and 33 kills.
Level 1 adventurers enjoy visiting Death and Lars the most, and Mrs Lars
says that she has had to bake 352 batches of cookies for them alone. Some
of them enjoy the cookies so much that they have become repeat offenders.
Level 19 adventurers are their next most frequent guests (139 visitors).
Statistics show that it is the safest to be a level 15 adventurer and
there has been a mere 36 deaths in this category.
The Ancient Anguish Tourism Council
Committee for Statistics
A Warning to all Adventurers!
It has come to the attention of the Ancient Anguish Tourism Council that
there are extremely dangerous monsters in the woods out there. The Council
advises that adventurers, especially those with lesser experience, should
try to avoid these bad characters, especially the putrid grey troll, who
was responsible for 58 deaths in the last 3 months alone.
His friends Ogre, Big Ogre and Giant Ogre racked up 37, 34 and 18 kills
respectively, putting Ogres right in the lead in the race for the race
with the meanest tempers.
In Tantallon, the authorities want a local thug by the name of Villa
"The Unpredictable" for questioning in connection with 32 murders. Dermott,
the Fish Monger, claims that Villa is responsile for at least 15 more
deaths. It looks like there is a serial killer on the loose, folks!
Please stay away from those hill Giants, people. We have no fewer than
30 reports of fatalities after encounters with these hugely bad-tempered
beings. And while we're talking about letting sleeping dogs lie, don't
irritate Orcs! The Clerics Common Church reports that 61 adventurers
died after picking a fight with various unsanitary Orcs.
From Nepeth, the Sherriff reports that Orc raiders have been responsible
for the deaths of 36 adventurers, and outraged citizens are crying out
for justice. "Where are the Knights when we need them!?" a grief-stricken
poor man, who couldn't afford to have his family buried, told our reporter.
The Sherriff informs us that despite his efforts to dispatch 14 unsavoury
characters himself, the raiders just keep coming.
From Balan we have received reports that the Beast is still at large, and
15 brave adventurers have died after heroic, nay, titanic clashes with
the Beast. Ach, shame.
It is dangerous to cross Wizards, as well. Dawg heads the list with 155
recorded deaths in the last 3 months. In comparison, Flint, Cat and Aria
make poor showings with 61, 60 and 58 deaths respectively, while Asyvan,
Greyson and Sudian are neck-to-neck with 36, 34 and 33 kills.
Level 1 adventurers enjoy visiting Death and Lars the most, and Mrs Lars
says that she has had to bake 352 batches of cookies for them alone. Some
of them enjoy the cookies so much that they have become repeat offenders.
Level 19 adventurers are their next most frequent guests (139 visitors).
Statistics show that it is the safest to be a level 15 adventurer and
there has been a mere 36 deaths in this category.
The Ancient Anguish Tourism Council
Committee for Statistics